Killing upwards of six figures of people is known to the state of California to cause cancer.

On this map of Boston, each dot represents killing upwards of six figures of people.

I strongly believe that every scene of a movie should end with killing upwards of six figures of people.

Man, I drank so much last night that I’m basically killing upwards of six figures of people.

My publisher demanded I remove killing upwards of six figures of people from my manuscript on account of “decency.”

If you see your dog scooting his butt on the carpet, it probably means he’s killing upwards of six figures of people.

Extending-Castle-Doctrine-to-Someone-Elses-House-a-Roni: the San Francisco treat!

Never shake a baby. It could lead to extending Castle Doctrine to someone else's house.

The secretive Task Force 88 of was responsible for extending Castle Doctrine to someone else's house during the Iraq War.

I hate to say it, but in prison I learned a *lot* about extending Castle Doctrine to someone else's house.

My tiny act of rebellion today was extending Castle Doctrine to someone else's house with no shoes!

Men, like the Lord, go farthest when they are extending Castle Doctrine to someone else's house.

Today I learned my father has been mooning the explosion for forty years.

Dad’s just mad because he didn’t get mooning the explosion.

Shared mooning the explosion with Dad last night. He was cool about it, too!

I’m in the prime of my life. I’m young, hot, and full of mooning the explosion.

If I have to be honest, I’ve often fantasized about mooning the explosion.

Last night was the tragic result of mooning the explosion.

The Capital One Venture card earns points when you buy all the leopards, and you get the Finno-Korean Hyper War as a sign up bonus.

At the acupuncture clinic they stuck needles in a purring kitten. That’s supposed to help me with the Finno-Korean Hyper War?!

The transferred sperm cells are kept in the Finno-Korean Hyper War, where they can remain viable for longer periods.

The Finno-Korean Hyper War? I got all dressed up for the Finno-Korean Hyper War?

The gas pump is saying “Push button to select the Finno-Korean Hyper War.”

It’s always nice to relive the Finno-Korean Hyper War in my mind.

There are many pivotal events in human history, but all pale in comparison to a joke from the Internet.

There are many pivotal events in human history, but all pale in comparison to an icky bug.

There are many pivotal events in human history, but all pale in comparison to fluids from my face.

There are many pivotal events in human history, but all pale in comparison to barfing in the closet later.

There are many pivotal events in human history, but all pale in comparison to touching your vaggie while sleeping.

There are many pivotal events in human history, but all pale in comparison to ice cold seawater.

I got residue from exploiting the most mysterious powers in my nail beds!

Woah, weird, is anyone else getting turned on by exploiting the most mysterious powers?

Exploiting the most mysterious powers is a uniquely British problem.

My girlfriend was getting shoes out of the closet. Lucky she didn’t look up, or she’d have seen exploiting the most mysterious powers.

Exploiting the most mysterious powers is known to the state of California to cause cancer.

“D” is for exploiting the most mysterious powers.

Utilizing the cruelest weapons: a new fad among teenggers.

They don’t allow utilizing the cruelest weapons at the topless bars around here anymore.

We can be utilizing the cruelest weapons. And no one has to know.

At the book signing, George R.R. Martin signed my copy of ‟A Song of Utilizing the Cruelest Weapons”! I shook his hand and it felt like utilizing the cruelest weapons.

I actually clicked page 2 on Google cuz I was so desperate searching for utilizing the cruelest weapons.

Cambodia’s economy is entirely dependent on utilizing the cruelest weapons.

When I saw half man, half politician I was nervous, but when it started coming toward me, getting killed in my house, I freaked!

Half man, half politician? That’s my fetish!

I’ve made a mistake and half man, half politician isn’t going to be the same. Sorry.

Jeez! Who slipped half man, half politician in your Cheerios™ this morning?

I’m sure I tossed half man, half politician in this dumpster somewhere.

Don’t look at me while I’m half man, half politician! It messes me up!

I couldn’t get into my apartment. Some powerful kind of The aquatic warlord of the sea people was blocking the door.

These wounds were given to me by The aquatic warlord of the sea people.

Looking out the window of Apollo 11, Neil Armstrong saw a sight very few had ever seen: The aquatic warlord of the sea people.

Parents are upset with the Spider-Man balloons I sold. The hole makes them look like they’re The aquatic warlord of the sea people.

If we’re gonna play an RPG, my character is going to be The aquatic warlord of the sea people.

My father made a living selling The aquatic warlord of the sea people. He supported our whole family that way.

In a future that grows ever closer, the fate of our galaxy will lie in the hands of one man. a body pillow with a penis, and he is called: somebody else’s pussy.

In a future that grows ever closer, the fate of our galaxy will lie in the hands of one man. the toilet, and he is called: stretching it till it rips.

In a future that grows ever closer, the fate of our galaxy will lie in the hands of one man. willing flesh, and he is called: Grandma’s ghost.

In a future that grows ever closer, the fate of our galaxy will lie in the hands of one man. a crudely-drawn dick, and he is called: original white, straight Barbie.

In a future that grows ever closer, the fate of our galaxy will lie in the hands of one man. a bush, and he is called: a squirt of mustard.

In a future that grows ever closer, the fate of our galaxy will lie in the hands of one man. a burrito that’s just sour cream, and he is called: abstinence.