Signa

Signa

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Signa
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2013 December 28
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136
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Recent posts by Signa

Recent posts by Signa

Jan 1 at 21:37 PST
Disguising fudge as poop
v

I don’t know how brimming with babies could lead to compressed gas but it probably involves disguising fudge as poop!
Experts said that based on preliminary data, disguising fudge as poop appears to have occurred on the Puente Hills thrust fault.
It’s huge. It’s wet. It’s sprawled out in the parking lot. It’s disguising fudge as poop.
Designed as a feature meant to enhance pleasure, the sex toy will robotically call out “disguising fudge as poop,” over and over again while in use.
At the coffee shop they put “disguising fudge as poop” on my cup. I ran out covering my face.
Disguising-Fudge-as-Poop-a-Roni: the San Francisco treat!

Nov 30 at 16:35 PST
A hill to die on
n

This food is so good it’s making A hill to die on quiver!
The problem with America is A hill to die on.
I got the roof as a pet! Do you want to see the racy picture we took with A hill to die on?
In Brea several people suffered minor injuries during A hill to die on that overturned their car.
I’m undergoing immersion therapy by continually exposing myself to A hill to die on.
Last night I dreamed of doing things to the body. I cannot shake the feeling that A hill to die on will arrive soon.



Dying on a hill
v

I noticed symptoms of laughing with a mouth full of firecrackers, so I went to my naturopathic doctor. He said, “it’s dying on a hill!” but I’m not sure.
When complete removal of the head is ready, dying on a hill will appear.
Sometimes, when I’m feeling naughty, I start dying on a hill before a hidden pancake.
Dying on a hill is legally grounds for divorcing your wife in 28 states.
I’m grounded ‘cuz my parents saw me dying on a hill at the party last night.
I like many people like I like my coffee: dying on a hill, put in a sack, and dragged across a thought.



A lesbian with a penis
n

The new hit reality show: Can You Swallow a Lesbian with a Penis?
For girl scouts, my daughter went door-to-door giving everyone in my neighborhood a lesbian with a penis.
In New York, a new law went into effect at midnight making it legal to buy a lesbian with a penis from dispensaries.
My house. 8 o’clock. A lesbian with a penis.
My kids keep installing a lesbian with a penis on the computer and I think it’s making it slow.
Class, turn to page 100 and start reading “A Lesbian with a Penis and You”.

Nov 3 at 17:31 PDT
Playing Surgeon Simulator with Jared Fogle
v

Pool rules: No running. No playing Surgeon Simulator with Jared Fogle. Keep a certain je ne sais quoi out of the deep end.
Wine tasters describe this Pinot Grigio as having silky hints of this spring’s hottest new fashions and a mouthfeel like playing Surgeon Simulator with Jared Fogle.
And my mother said, “How come you’re not playing Surgeon Simulator with Jared Fogle like your brother?”
Alexander also named a city in India “Playing Surgeon Simulator with Jared Fogle” after his dead horse.
“You didn’t even get me anything for my birthday!” “Yes I did, remember playing Surgeon Simulator with Jared Fogle?”
Original style is fine, but chunky kinda tastes like playing Surgeon Simulator with Jared Fogle.

Oct 15 at 13:59 PDT
Masturbating into a potted plant
v

You evaded my “Masturbating into a Potted Plant” attack! Most impressive.
The new Ford F-750 with more torque than masturbating into a potted plant.
I have to visit my uncle for Christmas. He’s always bein’ all masturbating into a potted plant when he drinks egg nog. It’s so weird!
Our secret society is dedicated to elucidating the mysteries of a strange candy that makes you gay masturbating into a potted plant.
Apparently, “Masturbating into a Potted Plant” is a dance move in the Hip-Hop and B-Boy community.
Traditionally, vampires and other undead are repelled by masturbating into a potted plant.

Sep 8 at 14:21 PDT
A poop hurricane
n

No thanks. My doctor said a poop hurricane makes defecation painful.
When I told my father he shouted, “No daughter of mine is going out with a poop hurricane!”
The new MacBook Pro weighs about as much as a poop hurricane and comes with 1 USB-C port and dope! Groovy!
I strongly believe that every scene of a movie should end with a poop hurricane.
At the mall Santa kiosk, the elves were caught sneaking a poop hurricane into women’s purses and bags.
Last night I dreamed of porkin’. I cannot shake the feeling that a poop hurricane will arrive soon.

Sep 1 at 15:17 PDT
Sep 1 at 14:37 PDT
A buttplug fidget spinner
n

A buttplug fidget spinner really messes up my butt complexion!
Dwayne Johnson has a secret tattoo that reads, “a ceremonial ribbon,” with a picture of a buttplug fidget spinner.
Two best friends and mutual discomfort take a road trip, and discover a buttplug fidget spinner along the way.
The patient kept screaming about “lubricant”. Then, right on the operating table, his stomach burst open and a buttplug fidget spinner emerged!
Help! I can’t find my daughter! She looks like no evidence of any infidelity and is carrying a buttplug fidget spinner.
The area around Fukushima has become a ghost town with a buttplug fidget spinner slowly overtaking the buildings.

2017 Aug 25 at 12:16 PDT
My mom says you have to call it  {n} or you get in trouble!

My mom says you have to call it an anatomically correct sock puppet or you get in trouble!
My mom says you have to call it rigid peen or you get in trouble!
My mom says you have to call it the royal baby or you get in trouble!
My mom says you have to call it baseless hatred or you get in trouble!
My mom says you have to call it a super-tiny butt hole or you get in trouble!
My mom says you have to call it reduced brain intelligence or you get in trouble!

2017 Aug 21 at 22:25 PDT
The fart zone
n

The fart zone isn’t getting old, but I sure am!
Help! I’m the fart zone and I need YOU to do something about it!
Today you’re on the receiving end of the fart zone.
There’s no reason for the fart zone before breakfast.
The 1940’s certainly had a thing about the fart zone.
I thought I was being attacked, so I defended myself with the fart zone.

2017 Aug 12 at 22:59 PDT
An invoice printed from a hooker
n

Soldiers in Iraq are deployed with aged beef and are ordered to be an invoice printed from a hooker no matter what.
World of Warcraft is adding a new character class so you can play as an invoice printed from a hooker equipped with daddy in his underpants.
An invoice printed from a hooker brings a smile to a child’s face.
In the end, the obvious plot twist was that the serial killer was actually an invoice printed from a hooker.
USGS seismologist Lucy Jones said the 5.1 quake has a 5% chance of being an invoice printed from a hooker.
Introducing, The An Invoice Printed from a Hooker diet, where you can lose up to three pounds in twenty minutes!



Printing hooker invoices
v

I refuse to roleplay as anything but printing hooker invoices.
Although moving away from printing hooker invoices proved effective for schools, the switch to my birthday initially led to a spike of child hospitalizations.
Always walk into an interview with Mom and Dad and confidence, and you’ll get the job. Unless they hate printing hooker invoices.
Slender and muscled, like any decent person. She was the spitting image of printing hooker invoices.
Printing hooker invoices is the spice of a disgrace.
I left my wife at home all day and she replaced justice for all with printing hooker invoices.