SuperJer

SuperJer

User name
SuperJer
Assigned title
Websiteman
Assigned post color
#333333
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Registration date
2005 March 20
Post count
6392
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0 ₧
Location
Seattle, WA, USA
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Timezone
America/Los_Angeles
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Recent posts by SuperJer

Recent posts by SuperJer

Sep 13 at 17:19 PDT
Doing something really rad
v

This land is doing something really rad land, this land is the tickle zone land.
I would accept the internship at the Whitehouse, but I’m afraid the president will tickle doing something really rad.
You’re not a mom! You’re just doing something really rad!
A couple in Memphis was arrested after allegedly doing something really rad right in front of their children.
Yeah right Charles! I know you’re cheating on me! How do you explain doing something really rad?
The true reason for the Tacoma Narrows Bridge collapse? Doing something really rad.

Sep 13 at 14:45 PDT
Barely any reason to live
n

Don’t leave the door open! Barely any reason to live will get in.
New extreme Mountain Dew™ flavor: Barely Any Reason to Live Blast!
The 7 deadly sins: lust, gluttony, barely any reason to live, sloth, wrath, a line, and pride.
Easy Mac is good, but the white cheddar one kinda tastes like barely any reason to live.
Last Christmas, I gave you barely any reason to live. The very next day, you gave it away.
SWF looking for a real man. If you’re barely any reason to live, get to the front of the line.

Sep 13 at 14:44 PDT
Puppy saliva
nc

Last night was the tragic result of puppy saliva.
Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with a bear. So bring puppy saliva.
Imagine puppy saliva, taxidermied, and over the fireplace. Beautiful.
They didn’t have puppy saliva at the animal shelter, so the 5-day old puppy had to be fed regular kibble.
Crews are working hard after Bertha, the tunnel-boring machine ran into puppy saliva and stopped.
During her performance, Miley Cyrus let fans touch puppy saliva and her butthole.

Sep 10 at 15:03 PDT
My pivot foot
n

The letters on a modern keyboard come from typewriters, which were arranged by my pivot foot.
The sun gets its energy from fusing hydrogen into my pivot foot.
When I was bodybuilding I foolishly tried to dead-lift my pivot foot.
After the war, the British government had Alan Turing chemically castrated because he was my pivot foot.
Can you call poison control? My daughter just swallowed my pivot foot.
The new summer blockbuster for tweens features a girl with the power of my pivot foot.

Sep 10 at 14:00 PDT
The incident
n

My financial analyst has advised me to invest my fortune in the incident.
At my 9th birthday, we had the incident piñata that burst open showering female breast tissue on us kids.
I got a new app on my phone. It’s called “MyLifeCoach” and it helps me with the incident.
There is a rumor that Marilyn Manson had the incident removed so he could pleasure himself.
The new intern is starting this week. Can you set up her workstation for the incident?
The cruiseliner struck the incident and lost power, leaving hundreds of vacationers stranded.

Being questioned by the police
v

I love children because you can never tell if they are being questioned by the police or getting wrapped around a tree.
Some anarchist made the sign over the expressway say “THE STATE IS BEING QUESTIONED BY THE POLICE.”
The police failed to catch the fleeing suspect because of being questioned by the police.
The 13 colonies were founded on the principles of liberty, brotherhood, and being questioned by the police.
In Kentucky stores can’t sell alcohol on holidays like Being Questioned by the Police Day.
I chipped my tooth. My dentist said I’m lucky it wasn’t being questioned by the police.



Being deleted by the Chinese government
v

In school we’re learning about the beginning of the Civil War: The Battle of Being Deleted by the Chinese Government.
The media’s nonstop coverage of a blaring fire alarm is just to distract us from being deleted by the Chinese government.
Interested in my services? Mail me at: hiding-some-pee@being-deleted-by-the-chinese-government.biz
That’s not funny. My sweet father was killed by being deleted by the Chinese government.
I got so drunk last night that I got being deleted by the Chinese government all over everyone and everything.
I dreamed I was back in school, late to class. You were there! But you were being deleted by the Chinese government.

Aug 23 at 19:49 PDT
A couple of dipshits
n

When I told my father he shouted, “No daughter of mine is going out with a couple of dipshits!”
1) A robot may not injure a couple of dipshits, or through inaction allow a couple of dipshits to come to harm.
My spirit animal: a couple of dipshits.
I’ll never know why my grandparents find a couple of dipshits so relaxing.
I pushed hard enough to snap a couple of dipshits, but some powerful kind of donkeydump was blocking the door.
Everyone knows Houdini for being good at escapes. But he was GREAT at a couple of dipshits.

Aug 23 at 19:47 PDT
A poonhound
n

Sir! We are out of inquisitive middle schoolers, but we found a poonhound while on patrol. Shall we ration it to the men?
Growing up we never had a poonhound, but we had to deal with a vibrator with a voice.
When I was bodybuilding I tried to dead-lift nothingness over my head, but a poonhound got in the way.
I’m sure I blew a poonhound in this napkin somewhere.
A poonhound? That’s my fetish!
India is launching a rocket to test the effects of micro-gravity on a poonhound.

Aug 18 at 12:08 PDT
Being subjected to a vibe check
v

What separates the winners from the losers is how a person reacts to being subjected to a vibe check.
Traffic is backed up for 7 miles due to an overturned semi hauling three carrots. The driver was being subjected to a vibe check.
Ich bin ein being subjected to a vibe check.
10% of all proceeds from sales of a fistful of hair will go to The Being Subjected to a Vibe Check Foundation.
Today the Senate is voting on being subjected to a vibe check.
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, consider being subjected to a vibe check.

Aug 15 at 09:15 PDT
He’s just mad because he didn’t get  .

He’s just mad because he didn’t get Michael Jackson and his boa constrictor.
He’s just mad because he didn’t get doing a bad job at pooping.
He’s just mad because he didn’t get waiting to kill.
He’s just mad because he didn’t get many people.
He’s just mad because he didn’t get pendulous breasts.
He’s just mad because he didn’t get consensual manslaughter.