SuperJer Against Humanity Suggestions PART 2

SuperJer Against Humanity Suggestions PART 2

General — Page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 91, [92]
Crytax
Ph. D in Cryonics

2006 Apr 26 • 234
11 ₧
The militias fighting   have a diversity problem.

The militias fighting a scary noise have a diversity problem.
The militias fighting maximum bitch mode have a diversity problem.
The militias fighting 19GB of horseporn have a diversity problem.
The militias fighting sudsy bodies have a diversity problem.
The militias fighting a one hundred dollar bill have a diversity problem.
The militias fighting spiders again have a diversity problem.



Being   is great. Unless you're a woman.

Being drinking wine in the tub all day is great. Unless you're a woman.
Being rude kids is great. Unless you're a woman.
Being a virus is great. Unless you're a woman.
Being “forensic evidence” (semen) is great. Unless you're a woman.
Being getting tickled until you bust a nut is great. Unless you're a woman.
Being answers to all of life’s questions is great. Unless you're a woman.



Here are nine ways becoming   is right for millennials.

Here are nine ways becoming cranberry sauce or juice is right for millennials.
Here are nine ways becoming those responsible is right for millennials.
Here are nine ways becoming circumcising your dad is right for millennials.
Here are nine ways becoming my sexual partners is right for millennials.
Here are nine ways becoming imaginary friend, Captain Howdy is right for millennials.
Here are nine ways becoming exhuming is right for millennials.



I just discovered that defending yourself from   is actually bad for you.

I just discovered that defending yourself from Taco Bell® is actually bad for you.
I just discovered that defending yourself from organizing children to join armies is actually bad for you.
I just discovered that defending yourself from a child drowning in a vat of molasses is actually bad for you.
I just discovered that defending yourself from doing surgery on LSD is actually bad for you.
I just discovered that defending yourself from the last great American is actually bad for you.
I just discovered that defending yourself from getting infected is actually bad for you.




A rag-tag band of misfits
np

I went to cut the cake, and to my delight, a rag-tag band of misfits popped out!
I’ve finally got the last of sufficient funds out of a rag-tag band of misfits.
I prayed to God for a rag-tag band of misfits, and God delivered!
Politics. The a Rag-tag Band of Misfits Party, is always trying to shove the collar around my neck down our throats. This time it’s a little spurt.
The raunchy adult film that’s got parent’s groups scrambling: A Rag-tag Band of Misfits Does Their Own Mothers.
At the skating rink there was a rag-tag band of misfits and everyone fell down at once.



Hell Skeletons
np

So I go over and I open the door and just as I suspected. It’s Hell Skeletons.
You’re not a mom! You’re just Hell Skeletons!
When Hell Skeletons is ready, a crudely-drawn dick will appear.
SpaceX is developing a machine to simulate Hell Skeletons to prepare for a mission to mars.
Aron Ralston was trapped under cough syrup for 5 days. He only survived by cutting off Hell Skeletons!
A woman is like a teabag. You can’t tell how strong she is until you put her in Hell Skeletons.

What if Gillette WAS the best a man could get?
 
 
Nov 13 at 15:03 PST
Taylor
2016 Apr 30 • 102
Killing snakes with tylenoled mice
v

This workplace has gone (0) days without killing snakes with tylenoled mice.
My favorite new band is “Sweat and Dead Skin and Killing Snakes with Tylenoled Mice”.
You’re not a mom! You’re just killing snakes with tylenoled mice!
A Freudian slip is when you mean to say your mother, but you accidentally say, “killing snakes with tylenoled mice.”
I surreptitiously crawled into bed, only to find killing snakes with tylenoled mice.
Cambodia’s economy is entirely dependent on killing snakes with tylenoled mice.

 
 
Nov 15 at 22:31 PST
SuperJer
Websiteman

2005 Mar 20 • 5602
This is getting ridiculous.

Roy Moore at the mall
n

Until quite recently, Roy Moore at the mall had the highest tensile strength of any substance known to man.
I want to be buried with Roy Moore at the mall.
If my neighbor doesn’t get Roy Moore at the mall off my property, I’m calling the cops!
Look, man, I’m not into Roy Moore at the mall. But $20 is $20.
When a mass of lymphatic tissue is ready, Roy Moore at the mall will appear.
Could you buy me Roy Moore at the mall? I’ll pay you back.



A woman sleeping near Al Franken
n

I slowly crept up to the bed, whispering, “Get ready for a woman sleeping near Al Franken
Men, like a woman sleeping near Al Franken, go farthest when they are giant meaty hands.
An FBI raid on Michael Eisner’s seaside villa turned up a woman sleeping near Al Franken in every room.
A woman sleeping near Al Franken saved is a woman sleeping near Al Franken earned.
I have to visit my uncle for Christmas. He’s always bein’ all a woman sleeping near Al Franken when he drinks egg nog. It’s so weird!
It’s dangerous to leave a woman sleeping near Al Franken on the stairs.

 
 
Thursday at 11:49 PST
SuperJer
Websiteman

2005 Mar 20 • 5602
Playing Mario and reading bible verses
v

New extreme Mountain Dew™ flavor: Playing Mario and Reading Bible Verses Blast!
I don’t need love because I’m playing Mario and reading bible verses. Sorry mom!
I go to Hooters, yeah, but only for playing Mario and reading bible verses!
Ok, I’ll admit playing Mario and reading bible verses might have been a bad idea. But to be fair, I didn’t expect it to result in a meat hook.
Sometimes, when I’m feeling naughty, I start dropping an upper-decker before playing Mario and reading bible verses.
I’m playing Mario and reading bible verses for Jesus.

 
 
Thursday at 13:25 PST
SuperJer
Websiteman

2005 Mar 20 • 5602
Showing up dead
v

In Kentucky stores can’t sell a feast of blood after 8pm, or on holidays like Showing up Dead Day.
I checked my son’s browser history. Found links about showing up dead and a penis and a vagina. Should I talk to him?
A Freudian slip is when you mean to say your mother, but you accidentally say, “showing up dead.”
At the book signing, George R.R. Martin signed my copy of ‟A Song of Showing up Dead”! I shook his hand and it felt like showing up dead.
Amtrak officials confirm showing up dead would have prevented train derailment.
I got a new app on my phone. It’s called “Showing up Dead” and it helps me with rude kids.



Turning up dead
v

Your attempt to get little Susie what’s-her-name drunk on lime vodka ended with turning up dead.
Turning up dead while driving has been statistically shown to increase the risk of fighting one-on-one.
Come on down to Golden Corral™ for turning up dead.
Every morning I hop out of bed and get straight to turning up dead, even before I put on my clothes.
A BBC team has witnessed the effects of turning up dead on civilians in rebel-held areas of Syria.
It’s important to pack the essentials when camping, such as water, first aid, a cornhole, toilet paper, shelter, and turning up dead.

 
 
Friday at 13:13 PST
SuperJer
Websiteman

2005 Mar 20 • 5602
FUCK!
nv

In this game you get to collect raw goose and craft FUCK!.
Your attempt to get little Susie what’s-her-name drunk on lime vodka ended with FUCK!.
Squad, circle up. It’s time to talk FUCK!.
At the Pirates of the Caribbean ride they replaced FUCK! with a robot dinosaur.
Meet me by the modern art installation downtown. You know, it’s FUCK! straddled by Disneyland!.
Aww! My mom packed a terrible lunch: Jews in cahoots and FUCK!.



  stands for "cool girl."

a wank stands for "cool girl."
deserving to be killed stands for "cool girl."
sticking a finger in my ear, and one in my butt stands for "cool girl."
popping out of the ground stands for "cool girl."
an ovipositor stands for "cool girl."
the brave men and women fighting for us stands for "cool girl."

 
 
Saturday at 15:16 PST
SuperJer
Websiteman

2005 Mar 20 • 5602
A guard rail
n

“Mommy, where do babies come from?” “Well, when there’s a guard rail in love with legs very much they do a... special hug.”
My daughter came home crying because the kids at school said she was a guard rail.
My new phone looks like it’s a guard rail but I don’t mind. It makes calls.
I’m late to my meeting for a guard rail.
You stole a guard rail from a child? You’re an ancient insignificant dead Jew and you’re going to hell!
During routine surgery, the doctors found a guard rail embedded in my abdomen.



A parking lot
n

The new self-help fad: Better Living Through a Parking Lot!
This is a great piece, it doesn’t have a lot of action, but it has a lot of a parking lot.
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, consider a parking lot.
In protest, Gandhi swore to abstain from a parking lot.
In this game you get to collect my musk and craft a parking lot.
After a truck ran over one more there was so much damage you couldn’t tell it apart from a parking lot.



Six geese
np

When he reached the New World, Cortés burned six geese. As a result, his men were well motivated.
Oh dear God! That was the last of my medication for “Six Geese” syndrome!
Alien cover-ups, false flag operations, and military experiments with six geese! It’s all here in my manifesto!
I booby-trapped my yard so that trespassers will be surprised by six geese.
I don’t think that even comes close to being six geese.
The Great Wall was actually built to keep six geese out of mainland China.

 
 
Saturday at 15:19 PST
SuperJer
Websiteman

2005 Mar 20 • 5602
We're already half way through  , so we might as well finish it off.

We're already half way through a slot, so we might as well finish it off.
We're already half way through breaking in, so we might as well finish it off.
We're already half way through weird legs, so we might as well finish it off.
We're already half way through a car full of Puerto Ricans, so we might as well finish it off.
We're already half way through an ancient insignificant dead Jew, so we might as well finish it off.
We're already half way through just plain racism, so we might as well finish it off.

 
 
Saturday at 15:23 PST — Ed. Saturday at 15:24 PST
SuperJer
Websiteman

2005 Mar 20 • 5602
My charred remains
np

My dad’s keyboard has a special key for my charred remains.
I’ve been single ever since my girlfriend found out I had my charred remains.
Meet me by the modern art installation downtown. You know, it’s my charred remains straddled by unbearable bitching.
Cambodia’s economy is entirely dependent on my charred remains.
In a world with Mom’s face being dipped in chocolate, one man must overcome my charred remains. Coming this summer.
In Arizona, because of the heat, they hand out my charred remains for free on every corner.

 
 
Yesterday at 11:10 PST
jeff is wizlord

2014 Nov 12 • 270
Well-worn baby teeth
nc

Well-worn baby teeth is legally grounds for divorcing your wife in 28 states.
Furious that I was dying in captivity into his spellbook, the sorcerer turned me into well-worn baby teeth.
Go, go, Gadget Well-worn Baby Teeth!
There is no “I” in “team” but there is an “I” in “well-worn baby teeth”.
Any man who can drive safely while kissing well-worn baby teeth is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.
If my neighbor doesn’t get well-worn baby teeth off my property, I’m calling the cops!

 
 
Yesterday at 12:09 PST
SuperJer
Websiteman

2005 Mar 20 • 5602
Finding most of the victim
v

Finding most of the victim is hurting me in the ocean of life!
There is no revenge so complete as finding most of the victim.
My publisher demanded I remove finding most of the victim from my manuscript because it’s “not decent.”
Gather round, family, it’s time to hang finding most of the victim on the Christmas tree.
If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t even be finding most of the victim.
J. Robert Oppenheimer is often called the father of finding most of the victim.

 
 
Yesterday at 15:07 PST
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